Oy! It's been a long time since I published anything but it IS Friday, so I owe ya'all something!! Have at it!
More Mullet Mania!
Let's be honest folks, give your dog what they really want! Cat Poop! Road Kill! Butt Stink! Free vomit with every order - yes, these products are really for sale!
Now, in tribute to FishWraps past, here's your jokes of the week!
In an apparent copycat terrorist act, Norwegian terrorists Sven and Ole Binladenson have hijacked a Goodyear blimp.
So far, they have bounced off five buildings. (thanks michelle!)
Here's the programming line up for the new Gay Cable Channel!
The Real World: Rehoboth (reality): Find out what happens in the summer rental house when 23 men (it was supposed to be seven) have to stop being polite and start getting real.
The Weakest Twink (game show): Randomly selected nightclub patrons compete to answer incredibly easy questions to which the answer is usually "Stonewall." Dismissive host Ian McKellen gets snippy when they don't know the answer.
Law and Order: Special Rights Unit (drama): Tough-minded team works to pass equal-rights and domestic-partner laws in states that don't want them.
Bitchy Switches (lifestyle): Lesbian couples swap houses with male couples and each has just two days and $1,000 to completely redecorate a room in the other's house. Pilot: Fur flies when Rita Mae and Sneaky Pie Brown add wood paneling and Napa Valley style to Jann and Matt's ultra-minimalist loft.
That Early '90s Show (sitcom): This week: Josh quits ACT UP and joins Queer Nation; Lucy tries to meet k.d. lang; Steve is outed by a hipster magazine.
With Six You Get Eggroll (reality): Upscale American couples race across China to navigate communist adoption laws. First one back -- with baby -- wins $1 million and a bonus baby.
Everybody Hates Andrew (cartoon): Once-sensible conservative pundit starts a contrarian Web site with his wisecracking pet beagle.
Savvy Regina (drama): Gutsy but lonely teenage lesbian snarkily narrates life in her Catholic high school.
I'll Wait in the Xterra (nature): Join hunky Kyle McAdoo on gritty wildlife adventures into jungles, swamps and grasslands. Or fine, don't.
You Gotta Love Rae (sitcom): Big ol' gal Rae gets overly involved with the lives of her family and neighbors.
Live to Tell (reality): Young contestants have just 60 minutes to come out to their parents, fight, reconcile and get back to college before the semester starts.
Bear With Me (sitcom): Sam and Art -- a couple of bearded guys -- start a bed-and-breakfast for like-minded hirsuters. But the neighborhood association's not too happy!
Never Again(more drama): Follows the complicated lives of Tom and Brian, who broke up after 11 years together and are now finding their separate ways in a new world.
Yves (talk): Retired hautecouturiste welcomes guests, hems skirts, smokes Gauloises.
It Was, You Know, Okay(dining): Two men (formerly boyfriends, now "business partners") travel to other cities and review trendy restaurants in a peevish manner.
Abercrombie's Creek (drama, b/w): Artfully shot saga of a shirtless teenage boy and his many, many friends who all live near a misty swimmin' hole at the edge of town.
Where'd You Get That? (shopping): Underemployed designers Todd Oldham and Isaac Mizrahi take you on a never-ending clothes spree through the streets of Manhattan.
Queen Bea (dramedy): Robert lives alone in his later years, but fantasizes his life as a "Golden Girls" episode. This week: A pre-Oscars dinner party goes horribly wrong.
Take Back the Night (adventure): Vigilante drifters Marsha and Jo (and their Weimaraner, Cleopatra) travel the country and help out womyn in dire straits.
The Fix Is In (cartoon): Clueless but lovable pastor runs rehab center for homosexuals who want to turn straight.
Breeder Lane (drama): Daily life in a cul-de-sac of straight people involves cookouts, soccer practice, Lamaze classes. Critically acclaimed, diversity-oriented glimpse of life in another world.
How Cosmopolitan Are You? I scored a 9. Guess that means I have to do some more world traveling. Damn, I hate that!
cos·mo·pol·i·tan (kzm-pl-tn) adj.
1.Pertinent or common to the whole world: an issue of cosmopolitan import.
2.Having constituent elements from all over the world or from many different parts of the world: the ancient and cosmopolitan societies of Syria and Egypt.
3.So sophisticated as to be at home in all parts of the world or conversant with many spheres of interest: a cosmopolitan traveler.
4.Ecology. Growing or occurring in many parts of the world; widely distributed.
*ed note: also a fashionable cocktail made with vodka, lime and cranberry - shaken and served up
The Wisdom of Super Models Could you repeat that? I was a little distracted...
The New Napster ... Would you pay for this? No way - not with all the great (and FREE!) Gnutella Clients available. Sorry Nappy - too little too late.
Did Homophobia Corrupt John Walker? - Michelangelo Signorile