Friday Fishwrap

All Quiet on the Western Front

Staz, the Engineer and pooch have left the building. Having been on alert for various animal wars and mishaps, as well as having 2 additional people rattling around our tiny little house, the sudden quiet here is a tad disconcerting. It seems like something should be happening, but it's not. I can actually hear a clock tick.

I got a call from them on the road about two hours ago - they were stuck in bumper to bumper no-go traffic before Bakersfield. At that rate, they probably won't arrive back in SF until midnight, which would make it roughly a 10 hour drive. Now, that's friendship folks!

Turkey day was great. The food turned out perfect for the most part, with plenty of leftovers, and we all had a damn fine time with a nice fire burning, imbibing and playing scrabble and a rousing game of Clue (Miss Scarlet is a WHORE!).

Friday, much to the missus' dismay, her West Wing marathon was preempted in the living room for all football and beer all the time, except when we were watching basketball and the World Series of Poker. Or was that Saturday? Or both? It's all a blur.

I had an absolute blast. I can't believe it was a whole week they were here, it went by so fast. Or slow, as was our pace. In fact we rarely left the compound except for that trip to the Salton Sea, the occasional grocery store run to restock our "supplies" and then a trip up the Tram last night to celebrate the Engineers birthday.

The last time I went up the Tram it was with a group of 12 rowdy gay boys, the place was totally empty and we owned the restaurant. This time however, it now being Season and a holiday weekend as well, it was packed. Getting on the cars, we tried to pull the 'ol "get on last" trick (guarantees a window spot at the door) but we were outplayed by a family of 4. Bastards! We weren't quite at capacity (80) but close. Factor in the kids running over our feet and the woman who seemed to forget she was wearing a very large backpack while doing pirouettes (Whomp! Whomp! Hello?! 'Scuse you, bitch!) we were slightly cranky by the time we reached the top. Which was also packed with people - all cranky as well. But we would not be thwarted! We were going to have fun damn it!

After a nice drink at the bar, it was apparent that the troops were getting pretty hungry. I flirted the hostess enough to get her to seat us early. The flirting paid off, she gave us the best table in the place, far away, high above actually - it was an aerie table, from any scampering twits. Great food, dynamite wine and fantastic company. It was the perfect capper to a great week.

Today, just as the animudges had finally accepted their multi species existence (actually the blind and deaf dog could care less, he didn't know the cats were even there except when he accidently walked into one), it was time to load up my buds car. The girls gathered their bags as I grabbed a quick smoke out by the pool. Something told me to turn around just in time to see the dog trip on the coping and nosedive into the pool (remember he's blind and deaf). Of course I dove in after him, fully clothed (thank god the pool was heated) and carried him out. Poor guy. 7 days that dog was here and never once did he come close to falling in the pool, but of course moments before he's getting into a car for an 8 hour road trip... Mmm Hmm. Wet dog smell! Pretty.

I dread the thought of work tomorrow morning but I'm basking in the warmth and friendship I enjoyed this past week. Life is good. I hope you all had good ones too! Cheers!

I'm super, thanks for asking!

innocent young bird
dead and cooked on my table
that bastard tastes good

Thanksgiving Haiku by irish-girl

Yes, I'm feeling oh so better now, much more zen. What is is. The cat came down, the animals are making peace, dinner is going to be great and I'm a happy camper!

I have to go run and put the bird in the oven but I thought I would share my photos from yesterday's excursion to the west shore of the Salton Sea. We stopped for date skakes in Indio on the way home. Mmm. Date shakes ROCK my world.

Meet My Cat, Santa

A while back I mentioned the severe case of hives I had (I know, enough with the friggin' hives already) and that the Doc had told me they were stress related. I can say for certain that they were not. Why am I so sure? Because if they were stress related, I'd once again be fucking covered head to toe right about now.

The Facts:

- Our two house guests and their dog arrived last night. Our bed did not. We had to sleep on the floor.

- Our bed is still not here. We will probably be sleeping on the floor again tonight.

- While the dog is the sweetest boy in the whole wide world and I love him to pieces, he's blind and deaf and walks into things. We have a plate glass wall and sharp furniture.

- The cats have completely flipped out having the dog around. Witness the fact that one is currently up the chimney and won't come down.

- When the cat does comes down at 4:00am, she will undoubtedly head straight for the white sofa.

- Two other cats are MIA. Perhaps they are with their friend up the chimney.

- We are hosting dinner for 6 on Thursday. We only have two chairs.

- Two of the six guests are suddenly single with achy breaky hearts.

- One is a vegetarian and I'm cooking turkey with sausage stuffing. Here, have a roll or something.

- A client called this morning and told me she absolutely hates the work I did. Start anew. Deadline is tomorrow.

- I barely made Fed Ex this afternoon. Think slow motion running while screaming "wwwaaait!"

In conclusion...

Stress? Check. Hives? Nope. Fucking doctors - what do they know.

Price Check!

Barcode Yourself

Ghost Rider Check out "trailers" for examples of X-treme stupidity. I have to say though - it's kinda cool. vrrooom!

Asya Schween Self Portraits. More
warning: some people may find these images too disturbing.
via presurfer

I'm gonna puke: Smittens

Object Sex. Kind of a Hot or Not for common objects. Why? I have no id3a.

Could this be real? Of course not you fucking moron! My favorite comment: "oh my god anyone who believes this ... do us all a favor and don't vote."

Good lord. I don't understand why women insist on doing shit like lip augmentation. Hey Rich? Care to enlighten me?

Then again... Check out these contact lenses. Kinda makes face painting look rational.

TGImp3F

Hey! It's Friday and it's been a while since I posted any tunage!

haver
\Ha"ver\, v. i. To maunder; to talk foolishly; to chatter. [Scot.]

Dada dada da!
delinked!

My Eyes! My Eyes!

I couldn't resist. I had to do it...
Michael Jackson and Joan Crawford: Separated at birth?

Threat Level: Green and White?
EAST LANSING, MICHIGAN - Spartan football practice was delayed nearly two hours today (11/19) after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the practice field. Head coach John L. Smith immediately suspended practice while police and federal investigators were called to investigate. After a complete analysis, FBI forensic experts determined that the white substance unknown to players was the goal line. Practice was resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.
Shamelessly ripped from Solonor who also reminds us that Sunday is the return of Opus.

In Other News
west elm is still the shiznit, sort of, even though my order is being delivered Monday instead of today as promised. Here's the deal, we have our best buds arriving on Monday for a weeks stay and we needed to improve the guest bed situation. Previously, we've only had the pull-out "bar in your back" sofa bed for their accommodations and they deserve so much more. So we decided to upgrade our master bed (the west elm purchase) and move our current platform bed into the guest room. The delivery coming on the same day as our guests leaves us in a tough spot though. They may need to make their own bed. No really, here are all the pieces - you need to make your bed. Welcome! Bienvenue! Pick up a cordless drill and stay a while!

I'll Take Potpourri For $1000

Here I was wondering how I could keep true to my diet on Thanksgiving. Well thanks to the good folks at Jones Soda I can relax. No calories - No carbs. Mmm, Turkey and Gravy Soda !

Speaking of turkey ... stick a fork in this guy. I'm pretty sure he's done.

Kick ass snowboarding game!

Real? or Implants? I got 9 out of 12.
via kim.

And now I must repent. I'm off to church... Beer Church!

They're Sneaky Bastards

Beware the Attack Turkey... Fear them. They're coming for you and your children. It's payback time.

Email Clip of the Week

"does anyone remember what to do with the challis that's guarded by the dragon thru the blue maze?? and what that bridge thing is for??

yes, its true..it took a rainy saturday, but the old atari 2600 is up and running...

so after clearing a couple of walls in breakout, followed by a rousing 10 minute tank battle, i'm trying to remember how to solve the damn adventure game.

so if you remember, come over... and bring beer...

wait, i hear pacman in the other room... gotta go..."

Wednesday What Nots

Sweet Bay is right... Sweet. I could rattle around this place. It might even make living in Florida tolerable. Hello Lotto!

Rapid Motion Pinball. Cool game but I don't get the "powered by FAG"... What the hell does that mean? Flash A-something Graphics? What an unfortunate acronym...

Blog Salad

With a side of raaannch.
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
After weighing the pros and cons, I've concluded from your feedback that no matter which book I read first the other will prove a disappointment. Therefore I will read them in the order in which they were written... Angels and Demons first, then The Da Vinci Code. Rest assured I will let you know if it was the right choice.
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
You know what I hate? Spam that claims to stop spam. Fuck off.
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
I got all hopped up on the Red Bull last night. I think I had a brilliant idea in my sleep. I can't remember what it was.
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
west elm is the shiznit.
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
I gotta brush up on my BlackJack before I visit the new casino.
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
Urp. Eat cheese.
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
It's the End of the World as we know it.
via the missus
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
Jesus, what will they think of next?

You Tell 'Em!

via clinton

Weekend Report

I didn't do much of anything. And it was good. Friday night I meet Uh-Oh Him and Itchyrae for a couple quick drinks at Lyons, but then wisely called it an early night and came home to finish Prey by Michael Crichton (it was okay - definitely not his best).

Saturday, was spent watching the trainwreck that is MSU. I went into such a deep pouty funk when the game ended that the missus decided the only way to console me was to go shopping. We spent the afternoon at Borders at The River.

I love getting lost in bookstores. If you can believe it, Borders is the ONLY bookstore we have, save a few used book places. I'm not kidding. And we don't have a newsstand either. Absurd. At any rate - after aimlessly wandering the aisles, here's what I walked out with:

Angels and Demons - Dan Brown

Harley Davidson Evolution Motorcycles - gift for a friend

Adventuring in the California Desert - Sierra Club

and a few CD's

Very Best of Sheryl Crow

Great American Songbook Vol. II - Rod Stewart

World Without Tears - Lucinda Williams

Cafe Del Sol Vol. 2 - chill compilation

Retail therapy works! By 8:00 that evening I was happy as a clam, deep into my book and chillin' fireside.

Yesterday I swung by my cousins to grab a beer, catch up and swap merchandise. In exchange for the most awesome pair of sneakers (Adidas Superstar Originals - white with green stripes - I have no idea where she found them!), I got her some nice MSU shirts. As she put it, now we are totally green and white and obnoxious, It's a sickness folks...

This week will be spent clearing my slate for next week. Our best buds from SF, Staz, The Engineer and canine companion the A-Man, are driving down for an extended stay. WooHoo!

Waving the white flag

The score is now 56-21. Wisconsin's band is now playing offense and Badger color guard is on defense.

We still can't convert.

I've taken an unprecidented preemptive measure to secure the safety of my flag. I took the mother down. Sparty fogive me.

My name is MJ and I make stupid bets.

Hi MJ!

My tale of woe begins with a guy named Marty. (it actually beings here... but that's another story)

Marty lives around the corner from me. I'm not sure what house exactly, as I've only spoken to him in front of my house as he walks his pathetic old dog in the morning. He's an older guy (60-ish) but very charming and talkative.

For some unknown reason, he seems to think my name is Marty too and I've never bothered to correct him. Maybe he thinks we have some kind of cosmic kinship in our names - but to me he's just a guy who's a little off his rocker and lives around the corner.

He's also a HUGE sports fan and because I have a giant MSU Spartan flag flying out front, has yanked my chain for the last year or so about Michigan State and the Big Ten.

All this was rather harmless of course until about 3 weeks ago...

That was the weekend of the Michigan Michigan State game. Marty knocked on the front door. He wanted to propose a friendly wager. I wasn't home so he spoke with the missus in a code she didn't understand and she had to write it down.

The scrap of paper read "Tell Marty I'll take Michigan for 5 and give her 5. She'll know what I'm talking about."

And of course I did. And I took the bet. You'd think I would have learned. Betting is a sure fire jinx for me, yet so enticing.

I lost.

Next time I saw him I had my $5 in hand and he said "No - Keep it! Let's go again next week with Ohio State! Whatever the line is in the paper - you got it. By the end of the season I'm gonna own that flag! Ha ha ha!"

"Ha ha - You're not getting my flag Marty, but I'll take the bet!"

I lost. Fuck!

So now I really want to pay the guy his $10 and just get it over with - enough already. But no... What do I do? I go all or nothing with him on the Wisconsin game.

So now every day this week he's tossed my morning paper up on my doorstep with little smarmy notes attached. This morning it was a friggin' poem. I have to share...

"I'm in a daze I don't know what to do
The line of the game now has Wisconsin minus two

There is nothing to do but to wait and brag
I just can't wait to get the big green flag

I don't want the car, house, or the Jeep
Cause when I see you, I'll start to weep

The thing I want is up the pole
So I guess today I'll start digging the hole

I took from you what you really did crave
But around the block the green did wave."

He's no Robert Frost but the message is there loud and clear. This fucking loonytoon is going to steal my flag!! What have I gotten myself into? This is not good! To top it off, I've totally jinxed my team!!

Learn from this my friends. Our mothers were right. Gambling is the evilest of evils and leads nowhere except down a long and sordid road to a flagless skid row!

Now excuse me while I go take that Gamblers Anonymous quiz and put a goddamn padlock on my fucking flag!

WooHoo - Go Spartans!!

You're a Winner!

Congratulations go out to LA at HeadRush for posting the 1000th comment since I moved off Blogspot to this domain last March.

Frankly I owe her a little something anyway but I haven't been able to locate it here in PS. Might have to try alternate sources.

And now for some pointless Lego fun!

Ever wonder how Lego's were made?

Too much Lego time on their hands... Bart and Millhouse

Wee Lego Me! Make your own here. Personally this makes me look a little chunky and much more well endowed. She's a brick... house...

I haven't quite figured out what the hell I'm supposed to do in this Lego Game but I'll keep trying...

That's it for now... Back to my strict no-stress regimine. (I wonder how long I can get away with this?!?)

It's beginning to look...

A lot like Christmas!

While us parched desert folk were slogging through over an inch of rain (1/5 our annual average), we had our first major snowfall up on the mountain. I woke up this morning to beautiful snow covered peaks in my backyard. Hard to see in my picture but the Tram Cam never lies...

Mom Finds Out About Blog

MINNEAPOLIS, MN — In a turn of events the 30-year-old characterized as "horrifying," Kevin Widmar announced Tuesday that his mother Lillian has discovered his weblog.

A Little Bit-O-This

A Little Bit-O-That...

Steve Ballmer's iPod

The Annoying Thing. Just when you thought it couldn't get more annoying...

LP's remember them? Good thing I still have my console. An amazing collection of Cocktail Records for sale. He's from Sweden or something but whatever - he takes PayPal.

Catapult. Adjust angle and power and smash the keep.

In other news:
Site is fixed. Finally.

Water God Angry. Much wetness falls from sky. Woke up to pouring rain today. It rained a bit yesterday too and I had the annual joy of rediscovering that my wipers had melted and deteriorated in the heat to the point that they just flopped around like dead fish on my windshield.

My hives are GONE overnight thanks to the miracles of modern medicine. I thought he prescribed an anti-histamine, but upon reading the insert, it's primarily an OCD anti-depressant with anti-histamine side effects. Cause is still unknown, but he suspects stress. Yes, that's it. I am definitely under too much stress. I shouldn't work so hard. I need to learn how to friggin relax! He also told me to quit quitting smoking for a while. Never had a doctor say that before...

That's it - I'm off to light a fire, listen to the rain, curl up with my book, relax and smoke. Forced stress leave and all that... Hey, doctors orders!

Freaky Fishwrap

Mystery solved. For those of you who have noticed the weirdness around here...

There are 3 different (load-balanced) webservers. One of those servers is handling this site incorrectly. Which is why the problem is intermittent... when a user is served by either of the first two servers, they have no problem. However, when a user is served by the third server, they experience the issue.

Should be fixed today.

Now if you'll excuse me, ::scratch scratch scratch:: I'm off to the dermatologist to find out what the hell is going on with these fucking hives. The allergist, and all those fun tests, come next week. I'm sure you're fascinated...

Things Your Mother Never Told You

Or

Getting Old. It sucks.

That's the working title of the book that my mother and the missus are writing. When they first proposed it, I thought they were nuts. But now that I'm pushing 40, I'm beginning see their point. In the past week alone I have suffered the following;

Acid Reflux
Sciatica
Bizarre allergic reaction resulting in full body hives
Trick Knees
Bladder Control "Issues"
Hearing and Memory Loss

According to my sources, it doesn't look like it gets any better from here. What pisses me off most is not the inevitable falling apart but that I am the youngest in my family and my wife is 7 years my senior [that's right, I said senior :P ]. They've been through all this. They know. And guess what? They ALL laugh at me... "Ha ha ha - just wait till you're [insert age here]!"

Thanks for the sympathy guys. Who's been there for you all these years? Who's listened to you bitch about your various ailments? Your ingrown toenails, your herniated discs, colonoscopies, your mysterious rashes and barnacles? ME! That's right. And now that it's my turn to bitch a little, all I get a whole lotta "Ho Ho Ho.... Isn't that cute? Cough snort wheeze snap crackle pop goddamnit honey get the Dones[tm]."

To make things worse, this past weekend a woman thought my brother was younger than me. He's 6 fucking years older. And to that I say, at least I still have all my hair and occasionally get carded at the liquor store... So there!

She's Back!

Nice to know that I can leave the front door unlocked - kinda like in Canada!

Thanks to those of you who took advantage of the opportunity to guest post here. I'm somewhat surprised at how well you all behaved.

Mopsie: Grandpa? Swat! Have you considered that you might have too much time on your hands? But you out did yourself with the Cindy Crawford thing. I'm going to hold onto that image in my head for little awhile... Yeah, that's nice.. You left out the Palm Springs Celebrity Tours where you get to ride on a big bus for several hours just to take pictures of walled compounds. But I'd skip it and go for the Jeep Tour for a real desert experience.

JadedJu: It's all true. Sad and true. Let's get it straight though.. I'm actually 18 and legal. That kind of misunderstanding can get a girl in trouble. I can answer your question about where the water comes from. Palm Springs is a naturally occurring oasis. The Coachella Valley is situated on a massive aquifer... Hence the "springs" in Palm Springs. You can actually visit the original springs in the Spa Hotel. The native tribe here is the Agua Caliente (hot water). They consider the natural hot springs here to be sacred and healing. Water is a huge issue in CA - no doubt. I agree with you about gratuitous water use. The aquifer is replenished from the Colorado River, but not at the same rate it's being drawn out... blah blah blah... I could go on but I can see people are nodding off already.

Mopsa: They're cousins! Identical cousins! I can't believe you told everyone that I used to get stoned! What about my wholesome image? What will my mother say? No scavenger hunt story? Damn I was hoping you might clear up a few foggy memories I have of that night... And for the record, I can't stand curry chicken any more.

So anyway, I'm back and I had a great time. Well, except for these fucking hives I've had since I woke up on Thursday. My histamines are totally out of control. In spite of repeated Benadryl popping, I'm covered head to toe with red welts. And I'm itchy. Very itchy. That made the awards dinner I went to pretty interesting... "Nice to meet you, pardon me while I scratch my ASS!"

I feel pretty, oh so pretty...

Juicy Juice

Yo yo yo-- Mopsa here---

As a tribue to my special friend, MJ, I'm going to share some little known MJisms. Some facts from her youth. Just a few tidbits of no particular importance that will shed some light on the mystery that is MJ. This is sort of like a eulogy -- only not. And because I'm busy as hell tonight -- the really juicy stuff comes later.

Ready? Begin--

MJ was the first person to ever introduce me to:

hacky sack
curry chicken
George Winston
Labatt's beer
the term 'baja'ing -- which refers to wild off-road driving

Every day at lunch time MJ and I would meet in the dorm lounge and watch the Patty Duke show. Sometimes we'd watch it stoned. Pretty butch, huh? We loved that damn show. I am not ashamed.

Contrary to popular belief (at the time) she DID NOT introduce me to anything else.

Thank you. And good-night.

A Byte-Size Tour of Palm Springs

Hi, Mopsie here (yes again!). I promise I won't hog the soap box all week, but I had to put up a link-tastic post in honor of the Most High Linker (as in status NOT under the influence of mary ja wanda).

If we are going to be staying over at MJ's (even cyberly), I think it's important that we all be prepared for Palm Springs. I'll be your professora for Palm Springs 101. (Nevermind that I've never been west of Kansas.)

First, of course, there is the weather. Bring your sunscreen -- we don't want you looking like this.

And please, Ladies and Gentlemen, don't just stop at your arms and legs. I need ya to strip and slather, because our first stop on the Palm Springs tour will be here. No one wants painful privates from a preventable sun poisoning.

During our drive, I have a small pamphlet on the history of Palm Springs. Please note that "On any given day during the winter season, over 100 nationally known figures can be seen around the desert."

Now, for our Mexico excursion trip (prescription drug run) tomorrow, everyone will need to brush up on their Spanish. My favorite is Hangman.

And just in case we get lost (since I'm driving and have no idea how to get there), please read this handy-dandy Survival Guide for the Desert. The best advice being: "It might be really helpful to have your lap top computer with you in the desert, so you can access this article. Keep that in mind next time you go wandering in the desert!"

And, of course, we need to be prepared for the fires. In honor of MJ here's a link to the Fire Prevention Crossword Page. You can solve the easy one and be a "Junior Firefighter" or solve the difficult one to become a "Fire Chief."

On a more serious note, if you would like to help out the citizens of California during these terrible fires, please check out this site.

Thank you for touring with Byte-Size Tours. We hope you will visit us again soon!

Palm Springs Exposed

JadedJu here, taking advantage of the cutest butch on the net leaving town, by talking trash about her domocile.

Do you know how ridiculously hot it is in Palm Springs? (How hot is it, JadedJu?) So hot that they have these mister things spurting out of business storefronts in the downtown area. It's supposed to cool you down (and it does, marginally), but it also underscores the insanity of the entire place. It's the desert, in case you didn't know. But there's more green lawns and flora and fauna there than in the entire state of Rhode Island. And though everyone has a pool in which to cool off, due to the extreme heat the water ends up being lukewarm at best, and as a result is not in the least refreshing.

So, you've got the water being used to keep everything green, and the water being used to mist you and prevent you from passing out due to heat prostration, and the water in everyone's built-in pools, and where's all that water coming from? That's one of life's little mysteries, really, because the entire state of California has a terrible problem with drought (hence all the fires in the past few weeks.)

But here's the real kicker: You'd think that all this heat would really age people, but it appears to do quite the opposite, and instead acts as some sort of preservative. Older people move there for retirement and find that the aging process reverses. If they were 65 when they arrived, they find that the following year they are only 64. Within ten years they are only thirty. Why do you think that MJ moved there? Rumor has it that she was at least 73 (see Mopsie's picture of MJ, referenced in the previous post) when she arrived. And now? As far as I know, MJ is only 17. It practically (but not quite) makes living in regular temps of over 110 degrees well worth it, and helps explain her obsession with internet games.

Only Some of the Keys

I made a little picture to post on here. But I couldn't get it to upload. After a few dozen four-letter words, I posted it on my site.

We miss ya Grandpa!
Love, Mopsie XOXO

Update: I spent WAY too much time playing paperdolls with MJ's head. I only posted one more on my site. Really addictive!

Handing Over the Keys

I am heading out of town for business back east. I've considered doing that free for all guest posting thing that seems to be all the rage, but then this site has been acting pretty wonky the past few days, traffic is way down - and I doubt anyone will be that interested. But it looks like fun so...

What the hell - if any of you are game and would like to keep things lively around here have at it. Feel free to just say hi, pimp your blogs, invite your friends and neighbors to come on by or do whatever the hell you want. Just don't forget to let people know who you are.

And remember that this is a family site... Bahhaha! No really, I'll be checking in periodically and if any of you start behaving in a manner that is unbecoming of the Fishwrap (which is pretty frickin' tough to do) like spamming or any other kinda nonsense - the shows over. I hope I set everything up properly - if not then oops.

Have fun! And don't break anything!

See ya when I get back!

This town is so GAY!

What a difference a decade makes.

Palm Springs has gone from conservative asshat Sonny Bono 12 years ago to idiot asshat Will Kleindienst to electing Ron Oden, a progressive openly gay african american, mayor in 2003.

Wow.

This picture says it all. The look on Kleindienst's face is priceless. You know he's thinking "Oh shit! I'm going to have to get a real job now and like work and stuff!"

As for the city council, that was quite a shake up too. Deyna Hodges, long time council woman, is out. And three new faces are in. Mike McCulloch came in first, Steve Pougnet (also gay) second and as a result of Ron Oden's election, his seat on the city council is going to open up which means the 3rd runner up, Ginny Foat (lesbian), will take his place.

I think there are going to be a lot of changes in how this town does business. We need change desperately. I'm incredibly happy about the outcome. WooHoo!

Vote Vote Vote...

Seems like that's all I ever do in this damn state!

Today, hopefully, Palm Springs will elect a new Mayor and two new council members.

While I kind of liked the idea of electing a lesbian who was the former president of NOW (also acquitted of murdering her 5th (or was it 3rd?) husband), sorry Ginny. I told you if you didn't stop stalking me with your recorded calls that I would have to vote for someone else. I've counted roughly 16 calls from her in the last 5 days. But I found out this weekend that I've been cheated. I got the low budget stalking. People on the "other end" of town have been getting calls from real live people including Ginny herself! What's the matter? Northenders a little rough for you? Actually I just wish I knew what you stood for! I have no idea!

That said, here are my two votes for City Council:
Bill Feingold and Steve Pougnet

Why haven't I won yet?

If that 80's music quiz (and my drunken attempt to bed two hot 20 year olds) wasn't enough to make me feel all old and shriveled up, I had to go and read this article about a group of today's kids playing the classics... Pong, Space Invaders, Tetris. OMG.. I almost lost it...

Tim: My line is so beating the heck out of your stupid line. Fear my pink line. You have no chance. I am the undisputed lord of virtual tennis. [Misses ball] Whoops.

John: Tim, how could you miss that? It was going like 1 m.p.h.

via the mighty geek

MySQL? No, You'reSQL!

If you can see this, you're one of the lucky ones. Yes, I know this site has been having some issues today. Thanks for asking. I put in a request to add MySQL to my service package this morning and since then things have been fairly wonky. Hopefully it will all be resolved soon.

People are ______

So why should it be...

I did frighteningly well on the 80's Music Test.

Final Score: 125.5

It's all a mystery to me!

I was going to post about yesterdays Gay Pride here in PS, but there's a slight problem. I don't remember what happened. I do remember rolling (literally) through the front door laughing hysterically and my lovely wife (who wisely chose to stay home) undressing me and putting me to bed.

There are many many things and people to blame for my sordid and lascivious behavior, including myself. Here's the short list:

- Rich and MJS.

- Two very hot and very young women from San Diego. Despite spending the entire day together, I can't remember their names. Did I mention they were really hot? And young? Before being physically escorted home, I pretty sure I propositioned them and offered to pay for the room. I think they agreed.

- No food.

- The People's Vodka. I broke the sacred "no red top vodka" rule. I'm paying dearly for it today.

I have a couple of questions... Who drove me home? Where did the beads come from? And finally, what the hell was I thinking when I scheduled a 9:30 meeting for this morning?

I am so hating life at the moment...

Spooktacular 2003

This years party was more subdued than years past, but still a total blast. The Missus and I once again took home 1st and 2nd prize for best costumes. She looked stunning in her hand crafted Bubblewrap Betty outfit (complete with clutch purse) and I was the Broken Tram Car - a local inside joke (backstory if you're interested).

I didn't take very many pictures, due in part to my not being able to see a goddamn thing in my costume, so these will have to do.

While it was witty and fabulous costume - communication with others was rather challenging. I could hear everything clear as a fucking bell in my personal echo chamber but nobody could hear a word I said (yelling didn't help) nor could they see me so I was pretty much ignored and left out of conversation except for the occasional "Oh my god! You're the TRAM! How funny!" To which I replied "Muflerbinshuffler hairy hutch!" ... "What'd you say?" ... "Neffermond..." Also, I couldn't smoke or drink with the fucking thing on. I definitely wasn't thinking ahead...

After the party we went to the 1st (and most likely last) Annual Tiki Halloween Bash. I know the guys who organized this thing and I really feel for them. It sucked. Big time. They hyped it to be to 1000+ people, with bands, go-go dancers and tiki bars etc. They had everything except the people. There were maybe 50 folks at most milling about trying to look like they were having fun. Out of sympathy for the organizers we stayed for about an hour before we started to nod off. Maybe it took off later but I am guessing it didn't. I really feel bad for the people who actually paid to get in.

Tomorrow is Gay Pride here in PS. Woot! You know what that means right? Brunch!

Room with a View

Hey buddy, can you spare $6M to save Mies van der Rohe's Farnsworth House?